Nutella

Let's talk about Nutella, and let's be honest about what it is.

It is a cream, not a chocolate. Cocoa and hazelnuts give it flavor, but what you notice first is the body of it: thick enough to sit on a spoon without running off, smooth under the knife, with no grain against your tongue. Take it from the fridge and it stiffens, so let a cold jar sit on the counter a few minutes before you reach for it. One hundred grams gives you 539 kilocalories, 29.73 grams of fat, 62.36 grams of carbohydrate, and only 5.41 grams of protein. That tells you plainly what this jar is for: pleasure, not nourishment.

To choose it, trust your eyes and nose at the jar. The surface should look glossy and even; the smell should be of roasted hazelnut and cocoa together, not one shouting over the other.

Some people say Nutella is basically chocolate, so a spoonful here and there costs nothing. No! Chocolate, milk or dark, carries its own good share of sugar and fat — this is not some lighter cousin of it. Believe that misconception, and you will spread it thick on bread, every morning, thinking you are having a small treat — when really you are having dessert for breakfast.